I used to think that avoiding what scared me was the easiest way to deal with it. If something made me anxious, my instinct was to steer clear of it. In the moment, it felt like the right choice. Dodging that meeting, skipping that social event, or putting off that big presentation—it all seemed to give me a little bit of peace. But what I didn’t realize was that every time I avoided something, I was actually making my anxiety stronger.
Avoidance is a sneaky thing. It feels like a quick fix, but it’s more like a band-aid that hides the problem without actually healing it. For example, there was a time when I dreaded speaking up in meetings. I’d stay quiet, telling myself that it was safer to let others do the talking. But the more I avoided those moments, the harder it became to participate. The anxiety grew, and my confidence shrank.
I started to notice that my world was getting smaller. The things I once enjoyed began to feel out of reach, and the opportunities that came my way felt like burdens instead of chances to grow. It was then that I realized something needed to change.
That’s when I learned about the power of exposure. The idea is simple: instead of avoiding what scares you, face it in small, manageable steps. At first, the thought of this made me uncomfortable. Who wants to willingly walk into something that makes them anxious? But I decided to give it a try.
I started small—speaking up just once in a meeting, attending a social event but only for a short time, taking on a presentation but practicing thoroughly beforehand. Each time I faced my fear, I was nervous, but something surprising happened. The more I did it, the more I realized that the situations weren’t as terrifying as they seemed. My anxiety didn’t disappear overnight, but it started to lose its grip.
What I discovered is that discomfort isn’t the same as danger. It’s just a part of life, especially when you’re chasing things that matter. The things I wanted—growth, connection, success—were on the other side of that discomfort. By facing my fears instead of running from them, I started to reclaim the parts of my life that anxiety had tried to close off.
Now, when I feel that familiar twinge of fear, I remind myself that it’s just a signal that I’m about to do something important. I’ve learned that I can handle more than I once thought possible. And every time I push through the resistance, I come out stronger on the other side.
If you’ve been avoiding something out of fear, I encourage you to take that first small step toward facing it. It might be uncomfortable at first, but that’s okay. The most meaningful growth happens when we step out of our comfort zones. And who knows? You might just find that what once seemed impossible is actually well within your reach.
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